InfoReisebericht, 23.11.2002

Fear and loathing in Wolfsburg

Mottofahrt nach WolfsburgRise and shine! That´s right, that really is 05:00 A.M. which surely is not a time for a human being to wake up! And if you´ve gone to bed only couple of hours earlier and it´s cold as hell outside, you really feel kind of, well, hazy. No beer, Markku, no beer today, I said to myself but I knew I was lying.

Half an hour later I was in a tram and going to the station. I still didn´t feel too good and had left my big plastic bag full of beer home. The tram was almost empty but the ones that we passed were full of friendly and loving people. I counted three middlefingers. Welcome to Köln.

Tomek was in time but our train wasn´t of course. Some Geißbock must had committed a suicide or something like that before the station. What a beginning. Don´t ask me if something happened in train between Köln and Kamen. I just can´t tell you. Sandman came right after getting in the train and next time I opened my eyes was later, much more later. Sorry about that, Tomek. But hey, I´m Finnish so I wouldn´t have said a thing anyway!

However, all of a sudden it wasn´t night anymore and Henning, Bodo and a bunch of alcohol had joined us. Others took a beer, I tasted my orange juice and started really to miss my beer bag. Harry and a bottle of licorice liquer, Dirty Harry, joined us in Hamm and completed our Strike Force. We celebrated that by eliminating Harry, the dirty one of course.

Orangensaft muss nicht immer das richtige seinNiederSUCKSen

Couple of hours later – NiederSUCKSen. There seems to be one large, flat and sooooo boring area in every country. Just a railroad, some shitty villages and then just fields till the end of the world. There´s an area called Pohjanmaa in Finland, in Sweden it´s Skane and in this country that big nothing is known as Niedersachsen. Thank god, there´s a medicin against this boredom. It´s called beer.

All the BVB-fans seemed to find that divine medicin and used it quite regularly too. One younger guy took an overdose. Thank god I had a flu and couldn´t smell anything! Others could and soon this young hero of football was puking alone. And he did it again and one more time again. Even stonehard japanese tourists had to move.

And let us not to forget our mute friend from Bavaria! He had a Bayern München scarf on and even the jersey was hided under the jacket. Eventually, he turned out to be able to speak, but it took some time, some photos and lot of coaxing in nice and friendly spirit. Are all Bavarians rude or why I couldn´t hear him saying goodbye?

Most of the black & yellow people left the train in Hannover but true pros stayed on till Lehrte. There we could eat some real breakfast (well, I ate only chips) and find lot of other facilities like a fresh air toilet with a nice railway view. After half an hour we left the oasis and joined the BVB-caravan again.

Wolfsburg ist ein schöner StadtWolfsburg ist ein schöner Stadt

Many, too many hours later - “Wolfsburg ist ein schöner Stadt...” - see, I´m not that bad in German. “Hurra! Hurra! Die Dortmunder sind da!”. Or are they? I really wasn´t sure because I just couldn´t see any signs of urban living in this town called Wolfsburg. Just some flat and grey buildings. And the police force of course. And when the authorities are there you had better have your legal advisor with you. We had Tomek and not in vain. Onkel Bodo´s only crime was to be just a little bit drunk but he was accused on a brutal terrorist attack on a mailbox (was it mailbox? No, it was something else, can´t remember what. Well, who cares!) that he had only passed by. Then these very same police geniuses also refused to pose for a photo. Didn´t Henning ask nice enough or what? However, no balls of any kind!

After this incident Borussens headed to the stadium. Aboriginals had their tickets and I got mine too. I just wonder where it´s from. It was dated on 18th of July 2002. Weird.

15:30 – Showtime! Oh yes, this tour included a football match too. Last one in the VfL-Stadion, actually, but maybe not the best one. Henning, Harry and Tomek seemed to be in upper terrace, I just don´t have a clue where Bodo was and I was locked in a lower cage. I´m green-red color-blinded but I´m not sure if that was the reason why I couldn´t see any VfL-fans at the stadium. I couldn´t even hear them. However, the black & yellow party was in full swing, especially in upper section.

VfL Stadion in WolfsburgFootball fans are coming home

The BVB itself looked like they had also partied last night and then woken up far too early in the morning. Just a few, separated goal chances and all of them were wasted. Volkswagen had a faster gear on and they accelerated away from the beginning. Not too many things to tell your grandchildren about this match. 2-0, rest in peace VfL-Stadion!

Wolfsburg looked even more hopeless after both darkness and the BVB were fallen. Henning and Harald ate some of the finest results of Turkish cuisine, Tomek was satisfied with German grain products. Poor Finn could afford only a can of Coke. My state of drunkenness was coming down and I could see the ghost of Sandman more and more clearly. After a waiting of one light year our train finally left.

After one hour of tight standing we found seats but Henning was the one who made the most interesting discovery. All of a sudden he found a megaphone that was hided in his pocket! ”Dää-däd-dä-dä, dää-däd-dä-dä, Borussia Dortmund, B-V-B null-neun!” was his statement.

In Hannover we had another extra number. Our bodyguards, those how wear dark green, had to put their helmets on and use some violence to safe us from the violence. But life goes on and so did our next train.

Later – Sandman, take me along

Holy moly, home again! And only 21 hours after that gloomy awakening. We said goodbye to Harry in Bielefeld, Henning and Bodo left the train in Hamm and Tomek and I separated in Köln. Too many hours, too many kilometers, too many fields, far too many beers, too many wasted goal chances and too many goals against Borussia. But guess what – it felt damn good! I can´t tell why but it just did. The match was it was but I still wouldn´t change a thing!

Now, good night, till the next time, till the next match!

Geschrieben von Markku Korhonen (FIN)